During our stay in the NICU, our eyes were quickly opened to a world we never knew existed. The world of having a child with a medically complex condition. We talked to numerous parents and families who were completely displaced from their everyday lives as they relocated hours away from their homes, so their child could get the care he or she needed. Many had to quit their jobs or had been sleeping on hospital couches for months as their baby received treatment. This now hit very close to home for us as we imagined what life would have looked like had Lilah been able to have the surgery she needed. We would have quickly become one of those families.

In addition to families facing a complex medical journey with their child, we were now thrown into another new reality- families who have faced the devastating loss of their child. A club that no one wants to be in. Parents facing the unimaginable. Despite our strong faith, we have been fully immersed in the waves of grief and PTSD since losing our daughter. We have realized that there is a need in our society for not only infant loss awareness but also resources for families grieving the loss of their precious baby.

AND SO, THE LILAH WREN FOUNDATION WAS BORN

In place of flowers for Lilah’s celebration of life service, friends and family donated money for us to give back to NICU families at MUSC. We were able to purchase Christ-centered resources for these grieving families, as well as help them financially with unexpected costs due to their hospital stay. We have since stayed in contact with the palliative care team at MUSC, and have been honored to hear how these resources have helped bereaved families. This was the first tug on our hearts toward creating the foundation and we knew we didn’t want it to stop there. The Lord was continuing to use Lilah to further His kingdom, just as He showed Gavin he would in that hospital waiting room.

Over the past several months, our eyes have been opened to the multitude of people in our own community who have experienced the devastating loss of their baby. Before losing our daughter, we were extremely unaware that this community of grieving families existed. We feel through our own experience that the Lord has now equipped us to help others who are facing similar circumstances.

WE FEEL CALLED TO THIS MISSION BECAUSE OF THE PROFOUND IMPACT THAT OUR LILAH GIRL HAS HAD ON OUR LIVES.

The Bible is very clear that we have an enemy, “prowling around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour” ( 1 Peter 5:8). Our enemy would love for us to focus solely on our sorrow during this tragic time, but we know that we serve a God who turns beauty from ashes. “And provide for those who grieve in Zion – to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of despair” (Isaiah 61:3). At times, the enemy has wanted us to believe that we were not capable of running this nonprofit. How would we balance this effectively while both working full time, raising a family, and while on our own grief journeys? However, every doubt was quickly met with confirmation from our Heavenly Father that this was exactly what we were supposed to do.

YOU INTENDED TO HARM ME, BUT GOD INTENDED IT FOR GOOD. GENESIS 50:20

On March 22nd, 2024 The Lilah Wren Foundation was approved by the South Carolina Secretary of State to become an official nonprofit organization. The Lilah Wren Foundation is dedicated to raising awareness for infant loss and providing support for grieving families. By partnering with pediatric palliative care teams across South Carolina hospitals, we will provide gift baskets that include resources, and financial assistance for bereaved families.

In addition to our work in hospitals, we will come alongside families in our surrounding communities to offer them this same hope in their darkest moments. Through our sponsorship program, we will sponsor families through their first year following their loss. Throughout the year, The Lilah Wren Foundation will support families in their grief through various avenues including but not limited to:

• Paid counseling services: Professional grief counseling to help couples process their loss.

• Financial Assistance: Help with the cost of groceries and meals in the first few weeks.

• Resource Packages: Faith-based information and materials on grief and loss, including books, local resources, guides, and other supportive measures.

• Care for Mom: Care packages including a Massage therapy gift card, and other special care for Mom based on individualized needs.

• Memorial Gifts: Special gifts throughout the year to commemorate important milestones, such as Mother’s Day, Christmas, and baby’s first birthday.

• Intentional Ongoing Support: Intentional ongoing support and check-ins provided by foundation volunteers, some of which who are also loss moms.

  We aim to provide a comprehensive support system to help families navigate their grief and find a path toward healing through the love of Jesus.

  We will use our Facebook page to help minister to families and those who love them, raise awareness, provide resources, and share all that the Lord is doing through this meaningful and much-needed work. Through the creation of The Lilah Wren Foundation, the Lord has even helped heal our hearts as we honor our daughter’s life and legacy in such a tangible way.